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-=[ Bumper Sticker, Sign Philosophy]=-

 [ << ] Sayings For The Modern Day 2/2 [ >>
42. I'm not your type. I'm not inflatable.

43. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.

44. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.

45. Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet.

46. Mall whore: I can suck the numbers right off your credit cards.

47. After I cook the vegetables, what do I do with the wheelchairs?

48. Here I am! Now what are your other two wishes?

49. Back off! You're standing in my aura.

50. I can't remember if I'm the good twin or the evil one.

51. Don't worry. I forgot your name, too!

52. Adults are just kids who owe money.

53. One of us is thinking about sex... OK, it's me.

54. How many times do I have to flush before you go away?

55. I have a computer, can masterbate, & have pizza delivery. Why should I leave the house?

56. I just want revenge. Is that so wrong?

57. It's sick the way you people keep having sex without me.

58. I work 40 hours a week to be this poor.

59. You say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing.

60. Can I trade this job for what's behind door #2?

61. Okay, okay, I take it back! UnFuck you!

62. Macho Law forbids me from admitting I'm wrong.

63. Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?

64. Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.

65. Too many freaks, not enough circuses.

66. Chaos, panic, & disorder -- my work here is done.

67. A woman's favorite position is CEO.

68. You look like shit. Is that the style now?

69. Everyone thinks I'm psychotic, except for my friends deep inside the earth.

70. Earth is full. Go home.

71. Is it time for your medication or mine?

72. Does this condom make me look fat?

73. Did I mention the kick in the groin you'll be receiving if you touch me?

74. I plead contemporary insanity.

75. And which dwarf are you?

76. I refuse to star in your psychodrama.

77. I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just wanted paychecks.

78. How do I set a laser printer to stun?

79. It ain't the size, it's... no, it's the size.

80. Meandering to a different drummer.

81. I'm not tense. Just terribly, terribly alert.

82. Oh my God, your tounge feels so good. God, your tounge should be illegal. Are your panties all wet now?

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