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-=[ Joke Number 899 ]=-

 [ << ] Chicken: The Musicans (4) [ >>
Why did the chicken cross the Road ?

The Band: To take a load off....

The Beatles: To be free as a bird!

Wolfgang van Beethoven: What? Speak up.

Vicento Bellini: She was a sonnambulist and knew not what she did.

Irving Berlin: Anything she could do, I could do better.

George M. Cohan: Just to ride a pony.

Bob Dylan: (1) How many roads must one chicken cross?

(2) She walks just like a chicken walks,
yeah, she squawks just like a chicken squawks,
oh she hen-pecks just like a chicken pecks,
but she crosses the road like a little chick.

Gaetano Donizetti: She first saw the light in the camp of the brave grenadiers.

Gloria Gaynor: It will survive.

George Gershwin: It aint necessarily so.

Oscar Hammerstein, Jr.: It was such a beautiful morning, such a beautiful day.

Al Jolson: For Mammy. You aint seen nuthing yet.

The Kingston Trio: The lions still roam the barranca And a hen there is always alone.

John Lennon: Reality leaves a lot to the imagination, but crossing the road with your eyes closed is easy.

Alan Jay Lerner:

(1) Just to be on the street where she lived.

(2) I know how it feels to have wings on your heels and to fly down the street in a trance. He flew down the street on the chance they'd meet and they met not really by chance.

Don McLain: This will be the day that I die!

Jim Morrison: To break on through to the other side, I am the chicken king

Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart: How delightful 'tis to wander, by the breath of evening fann'd

Cole Porter: It was just one of those things. Just one of those avian flings.

Elvis Presley: You aint nothin' but a chicken, crossin' all the roads!

Giacomo Puccini: As through the roads, she wanders onward merrily.

Gioacchino Rossini: A litttle voice she heard.

John Phillip Sousa: He was marching to a different tune.

Richard Wagner: The unexplained, unpenetrated cause of all these woes, who will to us disclose?

Giuseppe Verdi: Ever free shall she still hasten madly on from pleasure to pleasure.

Tom Waits: ...and the chicken, decked out in Foster Grant wraparounds and Purina checkerboard slacks, cruised across La Cienica Boulevard in a 1959 monkey-shit- brown Buick Super, while the yellow biscuit of a buttery cue-ball moon came rolling maverick across an obsidian sky, and why? you say? Cause that's life, and that's what all the chickens say. You're one one side in April, and you're seriouly run down in May ...

Kurt Weill: Chicken's sneakin' round the corner, afraid of meeting Mack the Knife.

John Williams: I'll have to thoroughly research the chicken's musical background before I can compose a road-crossing theme.

[ Stan Kegel, kegel@fea.net ]

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