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-=[ Joke Number 627 ]=-

 [ << ] Pirated Copies of W2k [ >>
Buyers of pirated W2K get what they pay for

Many purchasers of illicit software are becoming disappointed when they realize that the pirated copies of Windows 2000 they are buying are priced at what the software is worth. "I paid my buddy $1.50 for a Windows 2000 CD he picked up in Russia," said one annoyed buyer. "Little did I know that the thing was only worth $1.50." "I usually pick up pirated stuff to save money, but in this case I was stung," said another disgruntled buyer.

Microsoft officials were alarmed at the fact that pirated copies of the company's software were selling at fair market value. "This is definitely a problem for Microsoft," said a spokesperson. "How can we justifying charging $300 for a piece of software when its real value is only $1.50?"

Some analysts claim that people should be happy that they are getting what they paid for. "Those hologram thingies add at least $2.00 to the total value of a Windows 2000 CD," said computer pundit Robert Downswey. "People should be happy that they can get Windows 2000 for $1.50. It's a great deal."

Others aren't so sure.

"I'd say this piece of crap is worth maybe $1.00," said Chad Woolsley, a student.

"No way this is worth $1.50, hologram or no hologram," concurred Mark Aimsley of the Institute of Computer Education.

Some computer industry observers are concerned about the impact the poor software will have on the software piracy industry.

"With Windows selling for what it's worth, software vendors that rely on pirated copies of Windows will be hit hard," claimed software piracy expert John Sallow. "Profit margins are razor thin and sales depend on people thinking they're getting a deal. With this product, people are not satisfied with the price they're paying. This will ultimately lead to lower prices and thinner profit margins."

Software pirates agree. "I can't say that this is anything more than Windows NT with nicer icons," said a street vendor selling the product in Tel Aviv. "Heck, I can barely move these things at $3.00. I'm going to have to drop the price pretty soon just to get the damn things out the door. They're taking up valuable floor space, as you can see." Some cooler heads took a more reasoned approach.

"Microsoft should be happy that it's closing in on Linux's price," said Jennifer Glass of Integrated Data Systems. "Competition is fierce in the OS market now and will only get fiercer."

Computer expert Dr. Corey McNeil disagreed, citing that the 'priced right Windows' was still too expensive for what people were receiving.

"Look at it this way," said Dr. McNeil. "The price of Linux is $0. The price of Windows 2000 is $1.50. Given a choice, it makes more sense to get a great operating system, with far fewer system failures and great support through the Linux community by spending nothing. Even if you buy a bag of chips or a chocolate bar, you're still ahead of the game with Linux."

"Let me make this as easy as possible. Great operating system and a chocolate bar versus crummy operating system and no money left over for a chocolate bar." "The choice is clear."

[ Stephen Van Esch, ]

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