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-=[ Joke Number 3522 ]=-

 [ << ] April Fools Day [ >>
NEW YORK (AP) -- Century Communications announced today plans for an exciting new 900 service, with profits to go to help defray the cost of installing and maintaining enhanced 911 service across the country. Called "The 911 Chatline," it allows callers to choose an area of the country and to listen to 911 emergency calls from it.

When asked what prompted this unusual foray into the 900 business, Century spokeswoman Fawn Lebowitz said, "In recent years we've seen a dramatic increase in the popularity of reality-based television shows. The 911 Chatline allows callers to experience real-life drama while it is going on, all from the comfort of their own home."

While listening to the emergency calls going through, callers to the Chatline have a number of options. They can listen to just the 911 calls for the area they select, switch their call to a different area, or, probably the most interesting option, connect their call to the 911 Chatline to discuss the details of the emergencies with each other as they happen and before the police have even arrived!

Thanks to new voice recognition software from AT&T, callers do not even need a touch tone telephone in order to use the service. They can choose which 911 center to listen to simply by saying the area code and city that they are interested in listening to calls from. Calls are directed to the 911 center nearest this location.

As 911 centers sign up to receive their share of the profits, they are connected to the Chatline network. Century says it has already wired up over 50 centers and that it has coverage in most major metropolitan areas. They plan to have the whole nation wired by April 2007.

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