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-=[ Joke Number 2127 ]=-
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| On Tough Jobs that Involve Letters:|
It's not as easy as it looks, being on all the time. I mean, what happens if I'm in a bad mood?
-- Vanna White, Wheel of Fortune co-star
On Standards, the Mega-Rich and:
I'd rather not talk about money. It's kind of gross.
-- Barbra Streisand, dodging a question about what she was paid to direct and star in The MIrror Has Two Faces
On Disco Music, Importance of:
God had to create disco music so that I could be born and be successful.
-- Donna Summer, disco singer
On Giving It Your All:
I think we played hard, but it was a lackadaisical hard.
-- New Jersey Nets guard Otis Birdsong on why his team had lost an NBA contest
On Hostage-Taking, Fun For All:
[Being taken hostage is] an adventure for the tourist, because the tourist will end up learning about the customs of the tribes as well as their good hospitality.
-- Abdullah Ahmar, speaker of Yemeni parliament, on the practice of taking foreign visitors hostage
On Acting, Jean-Claude Van Damme's Interesting Insights On:
In an action film you act in the action. If it's a dramatic film you act in the drama.
-- Jean-Claude Van Damme, interviewed on Lifestyles of the Rich & Famous
On Segues, Unfortunate:
Speaking of animals, he married his wife, Suzanne, when he was in college.
-- Mike Leavitt, governor of Utah, introducing Senator Larry Craig
And in a class all his own....
On Book Reviews, Cogent:
It's a very good historical book about history.
-- former vice president Dan Quayle, about Paul Johnson's Modern Times
On Civics Lessons, Vice Presidential:
There are lots more people in the House. I don't know how many exactly-I never counted but at least a couple hundred.
-- former vice president Dan Quayle, attempting to explain the difference between the House and the Senate
On Earth, Where Found:
[It's] time for the human race to enter the solar system.
-- former vice president Dan Quayle, on the concept of a manned mission to Mars.
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