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-=[ Joke Number 1923 ]=-
| [ << ]|| Dating Application || [ >> ] |
| Application for Permission to Date my Daughter |
NOTE: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, linage and current medical report from your doctor. Please be prepared to submit additional information (like psychological profile and polygraph test) as required.
1. Name:________________________ Date of Birth:_________________
2. Height:___________ Weight:__________ I.Q._________ GPA:___________
3. Social Security Number:_____________ Driver's License #:__________
4. Boy Scout Rank:_____________________________________________
5. Home Address:_____________________ City:____________________
6. State:__________________________ Zip Code:__________________
7. How far can you run: 40 yards?____________ 2 miles?_______________
8. Do you own a?
A)Van____ B)Truck with oversized tires?_____ C)Waterbed?____
Do you have an earring, nose ring or belly button ring?______ Tatoo?_______
NOTE: If you answered YES to any part of questions #8, discontinue the application process and leave the premises!
9. In 50 words or less, what does "LATE" mean to you?_______________________
10. In 50 words or less, what does "DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER" mean to you?
11. In 50 words or less, what does "ABSTINENCE" mean to you?____________
12. Church you Attend:________________ How often do you attend?________
13. When would be the best time to interview your father, mother and minister?_______
14. Answer by filling in the blanks. Please answer freely.
All answers are confidential. (That means I won't tell anyone, ever)
* If I were shot, the last place on my body I would want to be wounded is the_____________.
* If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is_________________.
* A Women's place is in the _________________________.
* The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is________.
* In the unfortunate event of my untimely death, I would like ______________ to be contacted.
* My greatest fear is__________________________________________.
* When I first meet a girl, the first thing I notice about her is her____.
NOTE: If the answer to the last question begins with a "B", discontinue the application process and leave the premises. Keep your head low and running in a serpentine fashion is advised.
15. What do you want to be "IF" you grow up?____________________________
16. Have you ever been fingerprinted?_____ Had a DNA sample taken and recorded?____
17. Your dentist is_______________ Emergency phone #____________________
I SWEAR THAT ALL INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT, UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT, NATIVE AMERICAN ANT TORTURE, ELECTROCUTION, CHINESE WATER TORTURE AND/OR HOT POKERS.
Right hand Fingerprints
Thank you for your interest. Please allow 4-6 years for processing. You will be contacted in writing if you are approved. Please do not try to call or write. (It could cause disqualification and injury to your body.)
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